Pot Shots 2015, Volume 1

English: National Lacrosse League game with the Philadelphia Wings visiting the Minnesota Swarm at the Xcel Energy Center, St. Paul, Minnesota. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Adrian Peterson is stuck between a rock and a hard place.  The Minnesota Vikings won't trade him, so he whines on Twitter about the unfairness of his contract.  Well, if he hadn't been taking most of last season off because he got caught taking a switch to his child's behind, we wouldn't be subjected to any of this.

Cleveland vs. Golden State in the NBA Finals.  One team is carrying the ball for a city that hasn't seen a pro sports champion in over 50 years.  The other hasn't been this far since 1975, when Bruce Springsteen graced the covers of Time and Newsweek in the same week.

American Pharaoh is the latest horse to try for a Triple Crown, which is something that hasn't been done since the Disco Era.  At least he doesn't talk, or try to sell us satellite TV while being squired by a nearly naked supermodel.

The Minnesota Swarm are moving to the suburbs of Atlanta, citing financial issues and their inability to get a favorable lease with the Xcel Energy Center.  The fact that, in the Swarm's 11-year existence, few people knew they were an indoor lacrosse team suggests that poor marketing may also have been a factor.  Hope you like indoor lacrosse, y'all!

If a new soccer stadium is built, maybe the Twin Cities should try for an outdoor lacrosse franchise.

As we write this, the Minnesota Twins are tied for first in the American League Central Division.  No, this is not April 1.

The Timberwolves won the NBA draft lottery for the first time ever, after years of bad luck that would have perplexed a black cat.  Now the challenge is how not to screw up their number one pick.

Minneapolis is in the running for the 2020 college football championship game, which would be held in the new Vikings stadium.  Wait.  Minneapolis is a college football town?

Alex Rodriguez has now hit more home runs than Willie Mays.  A nation shrugs.

For the second consecutive year, the National Spelling Bee ended with two students being declared co-champions.  Either the kids are that good at spelling words most of us have never heard of, or the number of words in the final round needs to be increased from 25 to 40 or 50.

Deflating the Legend

Tom Brady (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

This is what you get for deflating footballs, even if your team didn't need that kind of help in a game that decided who went to the Super Bowl.

Quarterback Tom Brady was sacked by the National Football League for the first four games of the 2015 season for his role in the controversy that became known as "Deflategate".  His team, the New England Patriots, got fined for a million dollars and lost two top draft picks.  They will not, however, be required to give back the Lombardi Trophy that they won four months ago.

(You'll notice that neither Patriots owner Robert Kraft nor coach Bill Belichick received any kind of punishment.)

The NFL took this action after a report concluded that Brady was aware of what was going on when two of the team's flunkies allegedly let the air out of some of the footballs during the AFC Championship Game in January, which was won by the Patriots 45-7 over the Indianapolis Colts at Foxborough, Mass.  Said flunkies, according to the league, have been suspended without pay indefinitely.

Nobody looks good here.  Not Brady, who refused to cooperate with the investigation and will likely appeal his suspension.  Not the Patriots, whose suspicions by fans outside of New England that this is an organization that plays by its own rules have been confirmed.  And certainly not NFL commissioner Roger Goodell.

Goodell wants to project the image of an enforcer who wants to rid Dodge City of miscreants, much like U.S. Marshal Matt Dillon used to do on "Gunsmoke".  Instead, Goodell comes across as Deputy Barney Fife of Mayberry (OK, we've been watching too much classic TV.) when it comes to issues more serious than deflated footballs.  Like when players are caught on tape beating their significant others inside a hotel elevator, or taking a switch to the backside of their kids.  Or having to retire too early from the game because of one concussion too many.

It's hard not to feel sorry for Brady.  He and the Patriots have gone to the Super Bowl six times, winning four of them.  He has all those passing records that Peyton Manning and Aaron Rodgers doesn't have.  He has a beautiful wife (Credit:  Alanis Morrisette) in Gisele Bundchen, who happens to be a supermodel.  And someday he'll be in Canton, enshrined in the Pro Football Hall of Fame.

The NFL is right about the fact that they need to work on maintaining the integrity of the game.  Letting the air out of footballs is not one of them.  As for Tom Brady, he'll survive this the way he always has.  And so will the Patriots, whether fans like them or not.

Wild 2014-15: The Half-Season of Devan Dubnyk

Devan Dubnyk, Springfield Falcon, Canadian ice hockey goaltender (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The Minnesota Wild ended their improbable run in the NHL Stanley Cup playoffs, after having dismantled the St. Louis Blues in six games, by getting swept in four games by the Chicago Blackhawks.

We say "improbable" because before the middle of January, the Wild were so bad that they were one of the worst teams in hockey.  No direction.  Lousy goaltending.  Miles from a playoff spot.  Even coach Mike Yeo's YouTube-worthy meltdown couldn't move the needle.

Everything changed the moment Wild general manager Chuck Fletcher swung a trade with the Arizona Coyotes for Devan Dubnyk, a heretofore unheralded goaltender who had been bouncing around pro hockey until now.  Dubnyk started nearly every game since then, and did so well that few seem to remember the problem-filled tandem of Darcy Kuemper and Niklas Backstrom from earlier in the season. 

The rest of the Wild soon picked up on the newfound stability in goal and started winning games, making a dramatic run past other borderline Western Conference teams to get into the playoffs as a wild card.  For three and a half months, the Wild and Dubnyk were the talk of the NHL.  There was even speculation that they could be Stanley Cup contenders. Seriously.

After taking care of the Blues in the first round, everything fell apart when the Wild faced the Blackhawks in the second.  Not only were the Wild eliminated by the team from Chicago for the third consecutive year, but it was done in four games.  They were shut out in eight of 12 periods.  A reminder that for all the strides the Wild had made during the season, they never really were Stanley Cup material.

Wild owner Craig Leipold had built this team on high-priced free agent signings--Zach Parise, Thomas Vanek, Ryan Suter and anyone else who had anything to do with Minnesota hockey.  None of them made a dent in the Chicago series.  And Dubnyk was exposed for what he really was, a journeyman goalie who happened to peak at the right time.

The Blackhawks, meanwhile, have Patrick Kane, Johnathan Toews, Marian Hossa and Patrick Sharp--NHL All Stars who have plenty of experience in winning playoff rounds and Stanley Cups.  And the way the conferences and playoffs are now set up, they could be dominant for years to come.  So no matter how much money Leipold spends on free agents (Minnesota connection or not), the Wild will still be looking up at the Blackhawks.

Before next season, the Wild need to reassess their issues involving scoring and goaltending.  Dubnyk was a great short-term solution, but that doesn't mean the Wild can't go after some more experienced netminder who doesn't need seasoning in Des Moines.

Maybe by then, the Wild will have figured out a way to be more competitive in the playoffs against the Blackhawks.  But don't hold your breath.  The Twins are still trying to figure out how to get past the New York Yankees in the baseball playoffs.

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Our projected Stanley Cup Final matchup:  Chicago Blackhawks and Washington Capitals.